Fandom Forums - Out with a snarky bang

Well since I haven't yet lost my smod powers and I am done. Indeed, I don't really care about what happens for posting this here. Anyway, enjoy the following conversation (potentially evolving).

Sent to me today by skywalker42:

Quote:

Hi there

I would like to make a post I'm gona call it "naruto's heterosexuality" in which I will attempt to prove Naruto's heterosexuality without insulting the previous poster of "naruto's homosexuality"?

I realised that no one actually made a post for this, the only thing was done was lot's of arguments, insults, even sadly to moderator not you the other one got in on it aswell.

i'm near to completion of it and hopefully will be ready by say monday

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Why did he even write to me? Why should I care? Am I the mommy of the site, forever forced to tell her kids how late they can stay up? Fuck this shit. I'm having fun.
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Quote:

You know, I'm honestly surprised that you want to create such a thread. Spite is an ugly color, my friend. Did it ever occur to you that I posted in that thread for a more intimate, personal reason? I am a homosexual, sir. I am LGBTerrific and I won't let your little sourpuss sprinkle-pants party ruin something so genuine.

Naruto is a homosexual, I know for more reasons than I can freely, publicly admit without drawing media attention to certain powerful politicians. If you do not believe me, I will have a scientific team (IE: my former high school's science-nerd patrol) create an experiment. They will use THE SCIENTIFIC METHOD to interview me and then I shall amaze and astound: I can tell you the exact number of bright blonde pubes on Naruto's underpants area. INCLUDING TAINT!

Then, after this fact is proven I shall have a lawyer drop up some papers. Do you know what these papers will do? They will IP BAN you from the Internet. Yes, even the Chinese one and only Google could potentially get you back onto your Twitter account again.

So go ahead, create that thread if you have the balls... And the obviously apparent living, beating heart of hatred and intolerance. Twenty-ten is OUR year, you bigot. The truth will come out and hopefully you will live long enough online to see the rainbow revolution.

Now good DAY to you, sir! I have some cock to suck.

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And in case none of you knew, I am actually bi and my boyfriend helped me think of a few of these quips. Anyway... It's been real, people! Thanks for the rare, but fun belly-laughs.
[/lies?]
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Part 2: In which concessions are made...
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Quote:

Originally Posted by whateverhisnameis

Well I am truly sorry you feel that I am trying to insult your or your homosexuality, I know personally homosexual people and I interact with them, this is actually a first for me, to be attacked so ruthlessly because I am generally an understanding person. I don't let something like this stop me from seeing good things about people.

I just thought that I could for the sake of duality post this thread, for purely the sake of conversation, It saddens me to see people insult each other so much over something they both love. We all love Naruto, if to you he is a homosexual and that's cool, I just wanted to mention to me he is heterosexual and perhaps we could find some common ground on our ideas...
and to be clear i'm not feeling spiteful at all =)

have a good day

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Maybe if I throw in some actual, non-crazy logic then he might not care.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by DarkAzekt

Just because you "know and interact with" gay people does not quench the flames of hate you have already started. I know many, many Native Americans and am friends with them as well... But that doesn't change the fact I think of them as barely-human savages who are all alcoholics that deserve to be treated like cattle.

You clearly are not creating the thread for "duality." You're reviving a dead thread. The thread itself already took the exact opposite stance you are writing about... A debate, a discussion, a discourse where people disagree ALREADY HAS BOTH SIDES. If you read the old thread, you could see that what you are doing is nothing short of redundant.

Why should it matter to you what Naruto does when he is alone? The private, intimate, sensually sweaty stuff that goes on behind closed Japanese doors in Naruto's world aren't about you. How self-centered are you? You care THAT much that you have to go against Naruto's open statement of being gay - his own pride - his NINJA WAY?

Sir, your sexual preference bigotry is at extreme levels. I have already sent a message to my close, personal friends Ted Olson and David Boies. They have agreed to put out a warrant for your temporary arrest. They shall then FORCE you to become a key witness as proof of the hate that still resides for gay people in the Perry v. Schwarzenegger case.

Let's see if you have the COURAGE and MORAL FORTITUDE to admit your terrible prejudice to the world, not just this shitty forum.

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Part 3, in which we go for the heart:
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Quote:

Originally Posted by skywalker42

How can be the self-centered when I'm trying help see people a different side. Have you bothered to read my 2 posts (which have been locked, probably for the best)

My point is that we could differ sure, but we both like Naruto and check this out that you and I can have in common.
I don't agree with you on the point that one can be friends with others and hold them in low regard. It's not my way of doing things. I respect everyone even if it means that I am the one who's inconvenienced.

Perry vs Schwarzenegger? is that a court case? (sorry i'm not American, but i'll look it up)

Well I am genuinely sorry if I came across as being prejudice, i was just trying to create some peace

well i hope you have good sir
cheers mate =)

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Uh oh, I think he's on to me. I better end it on a strong note.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by DarkAztek

You see, sir, I have a very strong personal attachment to the thread you are critically assaulting. You see, my lover is from outside of the United States of America. Seeing as how I refuse to move to his degenerate, filthy home country, we are currently separated. He works here on a visa that expires every year and every single year we are together we have to worry more and more.

You see, if gay marriage is not recognized in these United States, the very person who gives me meaning in my life would be taken from me. This country's tyrannical laws tied to what constitutes a marriage could emotionally CRIPPLE me for life.

You see, young Sky Walker, Naruto and I are tied forever at the heart. Please do not get me wrong, whenever I see someone do what you do, THIS is the passion that is evoked from me. The future Hokage and I already are told we are not legitimate by the government... Do you really have to spit at us as well?

Tearfully yours,
Charles Oissubke Hankerton