|
Re: The Longest Thread Ever v28
Yeah, can't say I feel too bad for someone who dies because she wasn't not smart enough to follow directions on her medicine. Especially when she has a kid, who she really should think about before doing dumb shit. So I'm with team asshole on this one. Fuck yeah.
And my bro and I helped our mom's boyfriend's friend get rid of some freezer thing today. Apparently a fuse blew or something and it wasn't working for what must have been a few months, but no one notices until recently. It was also full of goddamn fish and butterball turkeys and some other shit. Maybe an ice cream cake. I dunno. I say was, because all I saw in there was black sludge shit that smelled like diarrhea from some foul creature that only eats diarrhea.
It was seriously horrible beyond imagination. I'm seriously at a complete loss of words here. It was the stuff of nightmares. I threw up within seconds of opening the freezer door, and didn't stop until there was nothing left. I also threw away everything I was wearing. My jacket, my shoes, everything. That smell is never coming out. I spent an hour in the shower just scrubbing my body. It was so bad. I'm going to take another one once the hot water replenishes itself. I still think I can smell it.
Now, that sounds unmanly, I'm sure. But you weren't there. No one else could even get close enough to clean that thing out, except my almost-as-manly-as-me bro. It would have killed any lesser man within seconds. The dude who actually owned that freezer and my mom's boyfriend were crying or some shit, I dunno, and just chilled in the other room after that. They couldn't even get close to it. I hate them all. The only reason we even stayed to do it was because, being true men, we finish whatever we set out to do. So we finished throwing up in the trash can and manned through that shit like demons.
We had those big rubber kitchen gloves and those little filter masks. I just grabbed all the big chunks of vile sludge and tossed them in the trash. Then we said "fuck this freezer" and duct taped it all up. My bro and I carried it out of there and put it on some trailer, took all our clothes off except for our boxers and threw them all in a trash bag to hopefully avoid permanently having that stench in my car, and left. We didn't say anything to anyone. Just stone-faced through it all. Because we weren't in the best moods ever and probably wouldn't have had anything nice to say.
So overall, pretty decent day. I'm going to go wack off in the shower. Yeah!
|