Originally Posted by KiddJutsu
I agree completely.
Ok Vish, lets discuss these last two chaps. Let me first say that this is like Bleach to me with some elemental powers working off your Naruto fanfic scenery. First, Arinasa is definitely Orihime (spelling) like with her soul shield abilities. The sword play is there, the God classes ala Soul Society, but with historical figures playing roles and immortality like The Highlander back in the 90s. So conceptually I'm all in.
My basic criticism is that we aren't as detailed on abilities. You paint excellent pictures of the elegance of the scenery but not nearly as in-depth on skills and abilities. And unlike the fanfic you've gone very lite on the action. We read simultaneous fight scenes with the higher level ranking Gods like Yama and Vishnu but we know jack on their secret powers except the Madara-esq meteor. So I'm all-in loving the theme but pull from your fanfic on the action scene writing. Besides that, can't freakn wait for more man.
I was waiting for your opinion Kidd. I value it the most ( without any offense intended to the rest of the people that read my stuff ).
Now, let's start with Arinasa. The ability that she used, was a basic one. Simmilar to what a Transformation jutsu would be for a ninja. But, soon i will present how certain abilities are availabe only to certain people. I don't intend to make her Orihime-like or wannabe. You will see.
Now, on the abilities of other characters like Claude/Vishnu or Yama. Those abilities will be gradually revealed. The next chapter will show more of Vishnu and Robert. Also, during Arinasa and Max's training several other aspects will be revealed. I want to gradually show what a character can do, not throw everything in from the beggining. Also, for example the battle in Paris between Yama and Vishnu. I off paneled that one, because for now i want to create a mistery scenery. Like, nobody knows what they can really do. Anyway, the next chapter will bring on the table a real battle. You should be able to compare it then with my previous three chapters. Right now, they are just starting.
I like to relate to the elemental powers and abilities, because they are the best ones for a fanfic in my opinion, and i think that you agree.
Finally thank you for the kind words and for your criticism. Because i really appreciate it. I'm really looking forward for your opinion on the next chapter when i will post it.