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Old 08-25-2013, 10:51 AM   #184
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Re: Naruto 643

Originally Posted by jeanericuser View Post
I guess this all sparks from a differences of opinion concerning confrontation. Some people feed on it and the more intense it gets the more their ego feeds off it. Its like a rapist getting it on with a girl against her will. The more she struggles the more it excites him thus making him want to get more intense.
I would agree with you to a point. It's true that there are certain people on the internet that do enjoy being the aggressor and starting conflicts, but that doesn't constitute the majority or even close to it. Even so, you wouldn't expect a rape victim to just sit there and take it without struggling, so why would you expect someone on a forum to take the abuse and not fight back as well.

The meaner the discourse gets the more egos are bruised thus fueling conflicts that go on for dozens of pages with what was once a single debate becoming a several person clusterfuck of posts that eventually just seems to stretch on endlessly until someone decides to just stop posting altogether.
Unfortunately in many debates not everyone can be right. If I say "A" is true and someone else says "B" is true, there may be a slight chance that both are wrong or both were right in certain ways, but most of the time one will be right and the other wrong. In a civil debate you would expect the wrong person to acknowledge so and learn why his answer was wrong. In the case of certain people (Yep talking about KY) he instead makes excuses for himself, claims people were misunderstanding what he meant, or just flat out refusing to admit he could be wrong. So it's not that peoples egos get bruised from insulting. It's that they allow their egos to overcome their seeking of truth.

Normally a mod would try to tone down the debate but with no mods interested in doing so it just ends up becoming one endless fight after the next. That is why some people no doubt have probably left. When you are holding a conversation one post then suddenly its replaced with an endless wall of text of people bitching endlessly about an issue it only serves to convince people that civil discourse is just not possible.
You can have endless walls of text and still be civil about it. The two aren't mutually exclusive. Some people may not be interested in reading through all of it, which is understandable. Sometimes it's necessary though in order to address specific parts of a post (I suppose like I'm doing now).

Civility is always important in all things whether you are on the job, amongst friends, or even simply amongst strangers.
I'm assuming in all those groups of people you would still correct someone who has made a mistake or said something wrong. Nothing uncivil about that.

When you show a lack of it you only end up sounding like a total brute hence why people will not wish to talk with you. If you want debate without bloodshed its best to remember to be civil. If you feel your emotions are getting overwhelmed then step away from the computer. The most important thing is not to let yourself get too warped by your emotions that you lose all sense of reason. That is when you truly become little more then a pain in the neck to everyone which thus leads to your eventual ban.
This part I completely agree with.

Last edited by ask me anything; 08-25-2013 at 10:53 AM.
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