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Old 06-28-2007, 06:15 PM   #1
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Uncircumcised Truth: A NL Conspiracy.

Today as I checked the Naruto Lounge forums, I noticed that the Second Annual Forum Awards voting process had begun. Using my vastly superior reflexes and agility, I quickly clicked on the most important category in the existence of all forum polling history: The Biggest Forum Moment Poll.

However, to my shock and dismay, the most important forum moment was not anywhere to be found within the selection provided. Obviously I’m referring to when Jaxon’s e-penis exploded into the forum room.

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. How could this be possible? So doing what any badass hero would, I began countless seconds of research so that I could uncover the truth. And uncover I did.

As you can see, the current selections include “Point system” and “Point system removal.” However, in the nominations thread the ‘Point system’ was never even nominated! Point system removal was nominated three times. There were two nominations in which I had no clue as to what the fuck the people nominating them were talking about, but even if you count those two towards ‘point system’ it still doesn’t beat the three nominations that ‘Jaxon’s e-penis exploding into the forum room’ received.

While many may say it was a simple oversight, or that Shino may have felt that such a nomination was inappropriate for whatever reason, I think we all know the real reasoning behind all this. Obviously the people in power wish to suppress massive e-penises.

Now you may not care. “It’s not my e-penis,” is what you’re thinking. Yeah, but who’s e-penis do you think is going to be next on the chopping block? Where will they stop? If you don’t take a stand now, your e-penis may some day be on the receiving end of Shino’s firm strangle hold of oppression. Is that what you want? Shino strangling your e-penis? I know I don’t.

Also, look at what else I found. When you spell Shino’s name backwards you get:


As any weeaboo can probably tell you, Oni means demon. Coincidence? YOU DECIDE!

And I’m sure if I fucked around with his birth date I could find a 666 in there somehow. Coincidence? YOU DECIDE!

And when you take out the ‘n,’ replace it with a “-“ in his name and add another "h" or some shit then scramble the letters around you get:


Oh shi-, indeed. Coincidence? YOU DECIDE!

Now I’m not blaming Shino, because there’s always a possibility that he’s just a figurehead being manipu---wait, shit, this is the conspiracy forum---I mean that he’s definitely just a figurehead being manipulated by some higher authority through no fault of his own. I’m going to go ahead and blame Bush, or Nazis. Or Aliens. Or just big-bushed Nazi aliens. Yeah, that works.

Obviously great injustices are being done. That’s for sure. Fight teh powar! Or at least get that poll fixed.

@Mods- This is a legitimate conspiracy theory. Or it’s at least just as legitimate as any other theory posted in here. If you’re going to close or delete this, you better close or delete them all! Win-win either way as far as I’m concerned. XD

This took me 4 minutes and 49 seconds to type, and is probably less than a page long on Word. Pre-emptive against "lolfreetime" comments from half-wits. ; )

Also, cocks.

Last edited by Miburo; 06-28-2007 at 06:19 PM. Reason: added more boldness.

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