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Old 08-31-2012, 03:09 PM   #1141
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

He could be establishing with Kezar how Sasuke was created to operate outside the rules of the creator. I agree it makes me think sasuke even before he was labeled Kezar but I guess we'll see.
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Old 08-31-2012, 03:10 PM   #1142
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

Naruto and Sasuke need to be sent again to another alt reality to start a new series simply because you have to put that creativity back into Naruto, plain and simple. And Uchiha, now that you and I both said Kazer is Sasuke Vish will get tricky tricky and switch sh*t up on us lol. But it's hard to think he isn't when I KNOW he is.
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Old 08-31-2012, 03:36 PM   #1143
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vishnu View Post
Of course that i'm playing with you sir! Isn't that what i am always doing in my fanfics? And about Naruto and Sasuke...i won't say anything yet!
Vishnu your fanfic is great as always, and when another is coming ??? and plz dont make this kind of post becose it makes me want to read it more
(sry for bad eng )

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Old 08-31-2012, 04:13 PM   #1144
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

@Kiddjutsu: If i wouldn't not add so many twists it would be a boring fanfic.

@Lopiskes: The new chapter will be up shortly, probably in two days.
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Old 09-02-2012, 03:46 PM   #1145
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

The new chapter will be up in one hour.
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Old 09-02-2012, 04:35 PM   #1146
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

The new chapter is up guys. This is just a "foreplay" chapter. The main dish is about to come in two more days. Tell me your thoughts.


Chapter four: The battle begins!



The scene shows the arena from the point where the last chapter ended. Gabriel is looking at every combatant, analyzing them.

Gabriel: Then...let's begin!!!
Instantly everyone clears the battle spot except Livontes and Nirriti.
Livontes: Archangel Gabriel...what are the rules?
Gabriel smiles menacing: There are no rules young Livontes.
Nirriti: That works for me.
Livontes: Same here. Well then shall we?
Nirriti smiles: Of course. I'm sorry for what i am about to do to you, Livontes.
Livontes: I am not.*
The opponents are standing still looking at eachother. Slowly Livontes starts taking out the blade from his back.
Nirriti thinking: So he is going to make the first move afterall. I have to counter his first attack. That way i can use the momentum to strike and end this in a single shot.
Livontes stops halfway, but his hands remains on the sword. He smiles.
Livontes thinking: He is waiting for me to move. He thinks that he can counter-attack. I have to move very fast if i want to trick him.
Nirriti: What are you waiting for, Livontes?
Livontes: I'm just curious.
Nirriti: About?
Livontes: About how you will respond to my attack.
Nirriti: Well, you will find your answer if you decide to attack, don't you think?
Livontes: Indeed. I will find an answer...
Livontes hits the ground with his right foot, very subtle. At the same moment he starts dashing towards Nirriti, still holding his blade. Nirriti take a battle stance and waits to counter. Livontes finally takes out his sword and just before he gets into the striking zone, in front of Nirriti's feet, a giant earth spike emerges, aiming for the angel's chest. Nirriti barely has time to jump and dodge it. Livontes smiles and charges his blade with purple energy, as Nirriti is in air.
Nirriti thinking: Shit! He was aiming for this! I'm in mid-air, i cannot dodge so easily here!*
Livontes makes a swing and releases from the tip of his blade a powerful wave like shot towards his opponent. Nirriti points his hands forward and projects a dense black energy shield. The impact it's impressive, as the dust gets raised up, even though the angel was in the air. As the dust clears up, the panel shows Nirriti unscathed. He landed safely on the ground.*
Nirriti: Clever. Just before you dashed towards me, you used your energies to control the earth and you tried to impale me with that spike. Knowing that i would dodge it by jumping, you were already prepared with that energy assault.
Livontes smiles: Hey, i had to give it a shot.*
Nirriti: Don't tell me that it's all that you have.
Livontes: Not a chance. That was only to test you.
Nirriti: So that's how it is. Well, i don't like tests. I'm sorry if i'm moving to the real battle and skip this unnecesary blows.
Instantly Nirriti appears above Livontes and releases from his fingertip a dark ray. A moment before the ray strikes he appears in front of Livontes, preparing to slash the angel with a black energy blade.
Livontes thinking: Dammit...a two timed attack!
Livontes acts immediatly. He grabs Nirriti's right hand and uses his body as a stepping stone, by pushing with his legs in Nirriti's torso. He jumps several meters away.
Livontes thinking: So i'm faster than him. That's good to know.
Nirriti suddenly appears behind Livontes.
Nirriti: Don't you think that you're faster than me, boy!
The scene shows only the blood as it's spilled. Nirriti managed to slash Livontes's chest with his dark energy sword. The angel is holding his chest. He looks at his hand. It's dirty with blood. His own blood.
Livontes thinking: Dammit! He managed to get a shot on me! And it's a nasty injure. I barely escaped death!
Nirriti as he is walking towards Livontes: You let your guard down for a mere second. You were deceived for a moment. And you almost payed with your life. You won't be so lucky next time.
Livontes thinking: He is right...i have to end this...and fast...
Nirriti: Are you thinking about ending this? You won't have a chance.
Livontes smiles: Maybe i will.
Instantly Nirriti releases another dark beam at Livontes. The latter creates a dense purple shield and manages to block the attack. Nirriti makes use of the momentum once again and appears exactly behind Livontes wielding a dark blade. Livontes turns around and allows Nirriti to impale him in the chest. As he coughs blood, he also starts smiling.
Nirriti: I don't see what's so funny.*
Livontes suddenly grabs Nirriti's hand and holds him tight.
Livontes: I was aiming for this actually.
Nirriti releases a shout, and using his left hand creates another blade. He slashes Livontes's chest once again, but the angel still holds him.
Livontes almost dead: Heaven's power! Inside burst!!!
Livontes releases from his body a giant purple sphere that envelopes him and Nirriti. Just after the sphere enveloped them, it explodes creating a giant blast. Flames and dust are everywhere. Soon, the dust clears up and the scene shows the two angels in the same position. They are both heavily burnt. Livontes finally releases Nirriti's hand and falls on his knees. He has two major cuts on his chest and he is missing his left arm. He coughs some blood and manages to take one final look at Nirriti before crashing completely. He is lyong on the ground, smiling and looking at the sky. The other angel has a shocked expression, as he simply falls down on his back. Nirriti is uncouncious. Instantly Gabriel appears next to them. He checks both of them and declares:
Gabriel: Winner of the first round!!! LIVONTEEEESSS!!!!
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Old 09-02-2012, 04:36 PM   #1147
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

The panel shows Vishnu's face. He is nervous as he looks at his friend. Quintrix is also nervous. Yama looks bored and Kalkin is excited.

Gabriel: Next battle! Kalkiiin!!! And...Viishnuuu!!!*
Both angels lands at the same time in the arena. They look at eachother. Vishnu is nervous and Kalkin is excited.
Gabriel: Are you both ready?
Kalkin: One question before we start.
Gabriel: Go for it.
Kalkin: Can i do anything i want? So if i have a chance at taking his head off or something like that, can i do it?
Gabriel: Nobody will stop you, if you have that chance in the battle.
Kalkin: So if the opportunity arises i'm free to do it, right?
Gabriel: Right.
Vishnu looks even more nervous.
Gabriel: Well then...Begin!!!
Kalkin: Vishnu, if you want to retreat now it's the moment. Otherwise, you heard Gabriel, i can take your head off!
Vishnu smiles: Go for it, Kalkin!
Instantly Kalkin appears exactly in front of Vishnu and delivers a punch so heavy into his chest that he throws the angel several meters away. Vishnu crashes, but he quickly regains his posture.
Vishnu thinking: Dammit! I cannot use my power! Not now! I must defeat him somehow without taking off the cloth on my hand. It must be a way! It has to be a way!
Vishnu: That's all you got, Kalkin?
Kalkin: All i got?*
In a matter of moments Kalkin appears and delivers a series of punches to Vishnu. The angel takes a good beating but he is standing.
Kalkin shouts: You are going to die if you keep it like this fool!
Vishnu thinking: I must resist everything that he throws at me! No matter what!
Vishnu gathers a bit of his energies and he sents a lightning from his palm towards Kalkin. The other angel simply deflects it with his bare hand. Vishnu appears in front of him and attempts a side kick. But Kalkin blocks the hit and punches Vishnu right in the chest.
Instantly Kalkin vanishes from Vishnu's sight and he appears right next to the angel. He fakes a clear shit, but Vishnu doesn't even moves an inch from his position.*
Kalkin: So, you're not afraid of me...
Vishnu: No, i am not.
Kalkin: But you lack the power to defeat me.*
Vishnu: I don't lack the power. I just lack the guts to admit who i really am.
Kalkin: I'm sorry Vishnu...but you really don't stand a chance against me. And i cannot waste anymore time with you. I HAVE to became an Archangel.
Vishnu: Hmm...normally i would let you defeat me...but i have something to prove to myself.
Kalkin: Something to prove to yourself?
Vishnu: Exactly...i'm sorry.
Kalkin shouts angered: You arrogant prick! You think that you can actually beat me! I will kill you!
Vishnu smiles and slowly starts taking off the cloth on his right hand.*
Vishnu thinking: There is no other way. I cannot keep up with his speed and power, if i don't fight with my full force.*

The panel shows Aphrodite looking at the battle that is proceeding to its final stage.

Aphrodite thinking: He is finally releasing his power...Kalkin is too fast and powerful for his sealed mode. So now, the Heaven...will finally witness Vishnu's power. Now, i'm sure that he is the one that will became an Archangel.*
Suddenly Yama's voice is heard.
Yama: I wouldn't think that Aphrodite.*
Aphrodite shocked: You...you can read my mind?!?
Yama: No. But i can see the expression on your face. You are confident that Vishnu will win this fight. You are confident in his powers. It means that you know something important about him.
Aphrodite: Something about him? I'm sorry Yama, but...
Yama stops her: I wanted to ask you: when we had that mission on Earth...i have found five dragon heads. Someone decapitated with a clean slash five dragons. Do you realise the implications? Even an Archangel has problems with one dragon. There is no way that someone could simply kill five dragons. And the interesting fact it's that i've found those heads exactly at the spot where you and Vishnu just were.*
Aphrodite: I don't know anything about any dragons!
Yama: Stop lying. Tell me, Aphrodite...who killed the dragons? It was you? That mysterious man, Kazer? Or your dear Vishnu?
Aphrodite smiles: Well it wasn't me. And i guess that you are about to find out if it was Vishnu or no.
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Old 09-02-2012, 04:37 PM   #1148
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

The panel it's switched to the arena. Kalkin starts releasing his energies. The whole ground gets seriously shaked by his sudden release. From his body small electricity fields are emerging. Vishnu still takes off the cloth on his hand as he watches Kalkin.

Kalkin: I cannot belive...that you made me release my powers! But i will destroy that arrogance of yours!*
Vishnu thinking: I must be precise. I must do it in one single shot. Otherwise, i will really have to go all out against him, and it's too soon to do that.
Kalkin: ThIs...is...your...END!!!
Instantly he dashes at a very high speed towards Vishnu, with his fist enveloped in electrical surges. Just a mere moment, before he can strike Vishnu, the scene shows the latter finally taking off the cloth. Instantly Vishnu's eyes changes, glowing in a gold color. Vishnu dodges Kalkin's punch and lands himself a powerful swing in Kalkin's jaw. The hit breaks the angel's jaw throwing him several meters away. At the same moment Vishnu wraps the cloth back on his hand, sealing again his power.
Vishnu thinking: I hope that's enough.*
Kalkin crashes into the ground, with his jaw breaked. His face is full of blood. He doesn't stand up. The crowd watching the match is standing watching the outcome.
Gabriel lands near Kalkin and inspects him. He looks at Viahnu with a mixture between shock and confusion on his face.
Gabriel thinking: With a single punch...Vishnu almost killed him. His brain is temporarily dead because of the impact, even though the hit landed on his jaw.He will recover...but...he will never be the same.
Gabriel approaches Vishnu.
Gabriel: Winner! Vishnuuu!!!
The crowd remains silent. Only a few applauds are heard. Everyone is shocked and confused. How could the weakling defeat one of the favorites?!?*
Vishnu: Just as i thought...
He jumps away from the arena and lands near Aphrodite. There he spots the angel talking with Yama.
Yama: An outstanding victory, Vishnu.
Vishnu: Dharma. What do you want?
Yama with a menacing glare: Nothing actually. Aphrodite here kept me...entertained...
Vishnu smiles : I'm sure she did. You should hurry Dharma. You're next.
Yama gets close to Vishnu and whispers in his ear.
Yama: You may have won against Kalkin...but get real kiddo...you have no chance at defeating me.
Vishnu with a menacing tone: You should chose your words carefully Dharma. Because you're next. Got it? And if ever get close to Aphrodite ever again...i will break every bone in your body and then, slowly...i will reap your heart out.*
Yama: Bold words coming...
Vishnu: Coming from the man who killed five dragons, eh?
Yama shocked makes a few steps behind.
Yama: So it was you?!?
Vishnu: You should hurry Yama. You are late for your next match!
Yama throws a menacing glare and leaves the place. Aphrodite looks at Vishnu.
Aphrodite: You shouldn't have confronted him.
Vishnu: Why not? He is a freak.
Aphrodite: It's not that. I heard that he is training with the Head Archangel. I guess that he is the next in line. So probably this contest it's all for nothing. There are rumors that Yama is already chosen as a next Archangel.
Vishnu: So, uncle Kubera is training him...interesting. Then, i will just have to shut down those rumors and defeat him. That way they will be constrained to give me the title of Archangel.*
Aphrodite: I never asked you...why do you do this? I thought that you were not aiming for this position. Do you think that you can became a Seraphim faster that way?
Vishnu: Not exactly. I want to be an Archangel for different reasons. At first, i hated the idea of exposing myself. I hated the idea that the angels would know my real power. I wanted to be a regular person. My only wish was to see our Father. Talking with him, it's not enough. I want to see him, i want to understand him, i want to realise his grand plan.
But now, i found something. His creation. You know...in order to speak with our Faer, you have to think of something that you love the most. When the image of the human being appeared in my mind, i realised that i loved them the most. And as you know, only an Archangel can leave the Heavens and go to Earth. I want to became one in order to spend time with the Creation. I want to discover the human being, and the Earth.*
Aphrodite: I understand...
Vishnu: Also...when i wanted to talk with our Father...another image appeared in my mind...
Aphrodite: What image?
Vishnu: Well...uhm...you...
Aphrodite confused: Me? But you said that you have to think about what you lo...!!!
Suddenly she realised the implications of Vishnu's words.
Aphrodite with a whole different tone; a surprised one: Me?
Vishnu: Yeah...you...
Aphrodite: But why me?
Vishnu: Well...you remember our mission on Earth? I came to know you that day and i really really liked you. Then, we got to spend more time together and i came to know you better. And before i know it...Aphrodite...i'm ...i'm...in love with you!
Suddenly Aphrodite stands up and goes really close to Vishnu. She looks into his eyes.
Aphrodite: You really mean that?
Vishnu: I do...with all my heart...
Aphrodite smiles and slaps Vishnu in the face so hard that he makes a couple of steps back.
Vishnu: Ouch! What was that for?!?
Aphrodite: Don't you think that you kept me waiting long enough!?! Fool!
In the next moment she jumps into his arms and kisses him with passion. Vishnu's surprised face calms down, as he responds to her kiss.
Just as they kiss Livontes lands behind them.

The scene it's switched. It shows the arena. Yama is facing Quintrix.

Yama: Quintrix.
Quintrix: Yama Dharma. Are you prepared?
Yama: For what boy? Killing you?
Quintrix: We will see...
Gabriel: Begin!!!
Instantly Quintrix jumps above Yama and release a dense beam of blue energy. Yama dodges the attack and takes out his sword. He jumps after the angel. When he reaches Quintrix's height, Yama slashes at him. Quintrix makes a spin into the air, blocks the sword with his foot, and takes out his own. He throws a swing at Yama, but the angel blocks with with an energy shield. They both land and engage in sword fighting. They are on equal ground. Yama tries to slash Quintrix from his right side but, the latter blocks the attack. Dharma uses the momentum to deliver a powerful kick into Quintrix's chest, throwing him away. Just as Quintrix landed he dodges Yama's sword. The angel threw his sword, aiming for the opening. Just when Quintrix dodges it, Yama appears behind him, grabs the hilt while is in the air and slashes Quintrix's shoulder. The angel jumps away holding his injury.
Quintrix thinking: Dammit! I have to go elemental!
Quintrix instantky spits from his mouth several fireballs at Yama. The angel deflects them all and releases himself a giant fireball. Quintrix slashes through it, by adding wind to his sword. Yama appears in front of him and tries to slash Quintrix again. But the angel blocks the attack.
Yama: Good. You left no openings!
Quintrix smiles: But you left one!
Quintrix's hand is pointed at Yama's stomach. He instantly releases a powerful blast. Dust is raised up. Yama jumps from the dust, unscathed, and lands several meters away. He suddenly started sweating heavily. His blade is stained with blood.
Yama thinking: I still do not control it as i wished.
The dust clears up and the panel shows Quintrix. His chest was severely slashed by Yama.
Quintrix thinking: What just happend?!?
Flashback.
Quintrix releases the beam at Yama, but just before the attack connects, Yama's eyes change and became red. As the beam is trying to hit Yama's body, the energies are eaten away by an unknown force, until it explodes, but without harming Yama. When the explosion occured, the angel used the moment to slash Quintrix's chest.
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Old 09-02-2012, 04:37 PM   #1149
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

Yama smiles: You see...i'm not that exposed as you thought i am. And you fell for my trap. You have two severe injuries. I wonder how you will be able to fight in these conditions.
Quintrix: I have to go all out in one attack. Even if i might die, i must use it!*
Quintrix throws the blade into the ground as he starts gathering his energies.
Yama: Eh? You don't need your sword anymore?
Quintrix sweating heavily: No...i don't need that blade anymore...
Suddenly the energies that Quintrix released are glowing white and the angel shouts:*
Quintrix: Light release!!! Blade creation!!!
In Quintrix's right hand appears a light blade identical to those used by the Archangels.
Yama thinking: So...he managed to awaken the light release. Interesting...
Gabriel is shown.
Gabriel thinking: The brat is able to use the Light release! That's a powerful tool! Yama will fall today.
Quintrix dashes at a very high speed towards Yama, wielding his light sword. Just when he is in striking distance, Yama shouts.
Yama: YOU CANNOT WIN IDIOT!!!
Quintrix slashes aiming at Yama's head, but the latter creates his own light blade, much easily than Quintrix. He blocks the first attack, and vanishes from Quintrix's sight.
Quintrix: What the..!?!
Instantly his eyes get a shocked expression. Yama's head appears above his shoulder. The panel shows Quintrix's full body. Slowly, from his mouth, blood is coming out. Yama impaled him in the chest, using the light blade.
Yama: You were filled with arrogance. And you payed. I didn't gave you a fatal blow, because i wouldn't gain anything if i would kill you. You lost...
Quintrix barely speaking: But how..!?!
Yama: I'm more powerful than any angel that is in this arena. That's how.*
He takes out the sword, and Quintrix falls down on his knees.*
Yama: I'm victorious.*
Gabriel looks at the defeated angel with sadness.
Gabriel: Winner...Yama Dharma!!!
The crowd of angels starts applauding.*
Yama: I will be the new Archangel...no matter what!

The scene it's switched. It shows Vishnu kissing Aphrodite. Livontes landed behind them.

Livontes: Vishnu.
Vishnu stops kissing her and looks at Livontes.
Vishnu: Livontes. What happend?
Livontes: I wanted to ask you something. Why did you released your power?
Vishnu: Because otherwise, Kalkin would have killed me.*
Livontes: I want you to know something. I am disgusted by you. You are a two face man. You are not a real friend. You are not a true friend. And you will never be. You betrayed me and you deceived me. If you end up fighting me, i will destroy you. I will come at you with everything i got.*
Vishnu: I don't know what i did to deserve this treatment. But just so you know it too: i will come at you with everything i got, too. I will not hold back.*
Livontes: Hmpf. You will lose.
He jumps and leaves the place.
Aphrodite looks at Vishnu.
Aphrodite: Wasn't he your best friend?
Vishnu with a sad voice: He is still my friend. But i don't think that he shares anymore my feelings. I don't understand what got to him...
Aphrodite: It seems that something serious...
Vishnu: Anyway...i will deal with Livontes. So...Aphrodite...
Aphrodite: You won't ask me anything right now. Let me enjoy the moment.
Vishnu: Understood.
Suddenly Gabriel's voice is heard.
Gabriel: Fighters! To the arena!!!
Vishnu: I gotta go!*
He leaps from her position to the arena. There he finds Yama and Livontes.
Gabriel: Since there are three of you, it will be a threeway battle. You are going to fight at the same time all of you. Each for his own sake. From now, you have two weeks to tend your wounds. In two weeks you will be present here, if you decide that you still want to became an Archangel. You are not allowed to attack eachother during this break. Understood?!?
All the three angels: Yes we understand.
Gabriel: Perfect. Then, you are all released!

The scene shows Vishnu leaving the arena.*

He walks around the Heaven's garden. He is thinking about the upcoming contest.
Vishnu thinking: Yama is strong...and Livontes...he is my best friend...i cannot kill him that easily, i must defeat him without killing him, because i wouldn't ever forgive myself. But...obviously they will push me to release my power. It will be hard...
Suddenly a man's voice is heard.
Unknown voice: You are thinking that it will be hard to deal with those two? That you must spare Livontes?
Vishnu turns around surprised and looks at the newcomer. Kazer is shown standing on a fountain and smiling.
Vishnu shocked: Kazer?!?!
Kazer: During the fight with Kalkin i noticed that you managed a little to awaken the power in your eyes. But Lucifer's demise was too soon, right? He was teaching you how to use your greatest assett..the Raigan...
Vishnu: How do you...!?!
Kazer: Currently even with all your power released...you are not even near Yama's level.*
Vishnu: How do you know?
Kazer smiles menacing: Let's say that...Yama is...an old friend of mine. Trust me with this.
Vishnu: And what do you suggest?!? And how did you sneak into the Heavens?!? The Archangels are looking for you! They want your head!
Kazer: Let me worry about them. Now, Vishnu...i have an offer for you?
Vishnu: What offer?
Kazer: Give me those two weeks to train you! I will make you unbeatable!
Vishnu: Train me? But how can you make me unbeatable?!?
Kazer smiles with determination: Trust me boy...after i'm done with you...nobody will be able to face you in combat!

The-end.
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Old 09-02-2012, 05:49 PM   #1150
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

Vishnu that was written beautifully, the fighting between them so simple and so enjoyable, felt like I was watching it. It did kind of remind me of DBZ, the begin of buu saga (the tornament saga). I am liking how you building the suspense and tension between each characters gradually..

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Old 09-02-2012, 10:51 PM   #1151
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

Vishnu - I agree that was DBZ esqe. And you got training sessions ala Goku/King Kai. It's weird but Vishnu is fighting like Konohamaru did once he got his dark energy release on his sleeve with his dragon attack before learning to add it with his sword attack. And stop the madness, a master of eye techniques who is a former friend to Yama and has eye abilities is none other than the current God of Death Uchiha.
Love the fight sequences too boss. It's either training time or a two week jump following that training correct? Eager to see what transpires.
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Old 09-03-2012, 02:09 AM   #1152
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

My god Kiddjutsu, you already know my plot's machinations. You deduced corect about the training, though i'm still oscilating a bit between presenting it in flashbacks or dedicate a chapter to it. Also, if Kazer is Sasuke, i would admit it. But i won't admit anything just yet.
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Old 09-03-2012, 03:32 AM   #1153
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

"Power"

We see *Naruto with his helmet on but the visor is flipped up showing his forehead, eyes, nose, and full trimmed goatee.*

As we see the whole scene all the Giant animals the enemy Samurai were riding are laying unconscious behind Naruto.*

Lillandra standing in front of Mikal and the other man, " how did you do that? You took them out in mere seconds!"

Mikal, " Sebastian, who is he?"

Sebastian steps up and places two fingers on his own forehead while looking at Naruto.

*His eyes widen, " he is our end."

Naruto, "Uzu technique: mirror image"

Suddenly every single dead body has a dark blue stream of chakra rise from them. *

Mikal, " you cant know that technique only two people have ever been abke to do it. Bastian!"

Sebastian claps his hands together and, " protection from drakness, level 3!"

A field surrounds the 3 Samurai.

Naruto, " Magi huh? I was hoping to get some *training in with one of you guys. Level 3, is that ur highest protection?"

Lillandra is grabbing her sword.

Naruto, makes hand signs, "Uzu tech jutsu combination: Gates of the Magi/shadow warrior Jutsu"

Shadow clones appear in various armors around the field surrounding the three.

Sebastian, " sorry Mikal, The shadow warriors can open up the field, I cant stop it."

As the shadow warriors open the gates and let the dark chakra in they start to surround the three.

They all start screaming in pain.

As Naruto begins to walk towards them Lillandra charges him with her sword drawn. * *

Without hesitation all the shadow warriors grab Lillandra *and Naruto connects with a sword of blue chakra empaling her.

As she falls there is no blood or physical damage.*

Scene change.


There is hundreds of Legion troops swarming. On several pillars we see Leo with Sasuke, Hinata with the Q twins.

Legion troop, "i guess you realize u can't win. Maybe its the fact that you are not equipped to handle so many opponents face to face in a fair fight?!"

Sasuke, " fair fight huh? *There are five of us and how many?"*

Hinata, "5000.

Sasuke, " of you, now the thing is with * * The Hokage, that officially makes it..."

Voice, " almighty push!"

One thousand troops ascend into the air.

Kakashi comes from underground,*
"Chidori Storm!"

Suddenly there ate flashes of Chidori bolts slicing through all the troops in the air.

Sasuke, "and now, it is completely unfair, Hinata?"

Hinata, " go twins, show them, ninja."

The twins jump down into the fray of the remaining troops as they land the giant hounds *have been released and are fighting beside them.

Twins together clap their hands together, "raging pack jutsu/ warrior hounds!"

Soon the two giant dogs multiple and gain armor as well. The armor covers their backs and heads.

Quantoz, " Ready Grim?"

The dog beside him, " hell yea pop!"

Quantez, " Reaper, we git this covered right?!"

Dog close to her, " Yes ma'am!"

The many huge dog clones are tearing through the troops.

Leo from the pillar, " hey is that all you got?! Your embarrassing the leaf!"

Twins together, " barb wire flame jutsu!"

Just then a huge barb wire net of flames descends upon the field setting hundreds a flame.

Sasuke to leo, " still an embarrassment?"

Leo " now they are *trying to show off."

Hinata, "not just them."

We see Kakashi with both eyes RG, "stop playing games, water style: eater dragon jutsu, earth style: canyon jutsu!

A huge canyon opens up swallowing hundreds *of troops, then fills with water from the water dragon, drowning the troops.
Then it closes up swallowing and crushing them.

Everyone in Legion *is gone, defeated.

Sasuke is looking outward, " i think phase two is starting."

We see 60 luetinets *approaching.

Leo, " you guys feel like these guys were just softening us up for the guys coming?"

Sasuke, " well then in that case, let's soften them up."

Kakashi, " everyone! Do not use any elemental jutsu, trust me. Do your best but conserve your chakra, we have no idea how long this will last. Fight smart, there is nothin in the rules that say we have to live through this. Got it?!"

They all nod, the twins cancel their jutsu and put the pups back into the big back pack.*

Hinata, *" use your training , from this point on we must all fight to survive this, take it seriously."

Scene change.

We *see Team Naruto, they are all looking determined.*

We see them with their Samurai leader facing off with *huge dragon. There is another one laying motionless behind them

Rakia, " didnt know that there was a Father and a Mother too!"

Hiroshi , " we are all near out of chakra we dint have enough to go Sage either."

Eiyuu, "we have enough for that technique!"

Sasha, " no i will take care of it. "

Voice, " no, you won't."

Naruo appears from an Uzu tunnel (like the one that brought team Naruto there)

Rakia, "Ni san Sensei!"

Hiroshi, " sensei?"

Naruto, "hey team, you look tired. Have you been getting much rest?"

Sasha, " excuse me, what do you mean i won't?"

Naruto, " why are you here at Dragon *haven? These dragons are allies if the Uzu. "

Dragon, "these bastards capture my child and put my husband to sleep! They will pay!"

Naruto , " it is wrong what was done, my students were misguided. But I came here to sign a partnership with your people, are you not the Dragon Goddess?"

Sasha, " what? No one has ever partnered with the dragon Gods!"

Naruto, " i am not empty handed."

*He claps his hand and paces them on the ground, " transport seal!"

The dragon they encased in the ice is in good health, standing before them. Suddenly naruto is ove by the sleeping dragon. He places his hand on him saying "release, then he also stands.

Dragon goddess, " i except your good gestures, in all fairness your arudents and their guide came here on fals information. A great beast attacked a village near your people but it was not a dragon. Had they simply asked they would have learned this."

Sasha,kneeling, " i am sorry please know that i had no idea."

Naruto, " something tells me if she didnt, you would all be dead before I got here."

Dragon Goddess, " transformation."

She turns into a beautiful long haired Queen, dressed in gold and red.*

She kisses Naruto on the forehead then suddenly they all arrive back at the Uzu strong hold.

Sasha, " you have just made a partnership with the most powerful ruling Goddess of the Creature and elenetal realms. Who are you Naruto Uzumaki?"

His team runs and hugs him, tackling him to the ground.

Rakia, " he is our Sensei and *the next Hokage of the Leaf City!"

Someone walks up in formal Samurai garb, " Shogun, you and your students are needed, you must go to the land of Light. "

Naruto, " Is it happening?"

Sasha, " I'm going."*

Next: "final exams"
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Old 09-03-2012, 11:39 AM   #1154
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Talking Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

Two Words jericho Uzimaki BAD ASS!!! That was Incredible Just freakin Incredible
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Check out my Fanfiction from the very Beginning on page "37" in Naruto Fan Fiction Thread and it continues on pages "47,49,57,61,62,63,70,71,72"

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Old 09-03-2012, 11:58 AM   #1155
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Re: Naruto Fan Fiction Thread!!

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Originally Posted by Narut0360 View Post
Two Words jericho Uzimaki BAD ASS!!! That was Incredible Just freakin Incredible
I couldn't agree more bro. Jericho, you are head of the class when it comes to creating special jutsu and fighting style combinations in your fanfic. Love the arena Gladiator style fight scene with Kakashi getting a Super Mario mushroom upgrade with his seals that release Naruto's chakra boosting him to the Rinnegan. You are in a groove with this story. Gotta read more of it especially since you've got fighting on three different scenes. Killer stuff sir, must have more.

N360 - you've been like M.I.A. for too long with your fanfic sir. When can we expect a reboot? You left the story at a great place to easily have us readers to pick back up from.
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