zer0systm

I'm going to buy a really hairy dog, dye it gold, then spike it's hair up with gel and tell everyone I have a Super Saiyan Dog.......

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Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Miburo

^You can have my dog. It's not hairy, but it's free.

Yes.

I grilled some hamburgers the other day, and it jumped up onto the kitchen counter and ate them while I was getting the rest of the shit from the grill. It also opens the bread basket thing I have and eats all mai bread. Then, like some goddamn beast of spite, shits on the kitchen floor during the night. This was all after I spent a few hours playing ball with it right beforehand, and then fed it. So it doesn't even have a reason to do this to me. I'm nice as fuck to it, and it already ate.

So now I have all my food hidden in the top shelf where it is literally physically impossible for it to get to. I picked it up and checked to make sure.

What pisses me off the most is that it seriously doesn't give a fuck. It'll try to dig into the trash or hop up on a counter even if I'm standing right there. And every time it does something like this I have this urge to just brutally destroy it like a rabid chimpanzee. And then I'll yell at it and be all like "Fuck you, dog. You have to know I can kick your ass. Why the fuck do you provoke me so?!" And it'll just do some sort of mocking playful growl at me.

I think it wants me to kill it.

zer0systm

When it jumps up yell at it so it cowers and grab it by the scruff of the neck and drag it to the floor then yell at it again and push it away from the counter

It'll take a few times but your dog should start to get the message, but then again you say it is really fucking stupid.....

__________________
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Miburo

Oh, way ahead of you, man. If I see it jumping up on something I'll spartan push kick it down and yell at it. I've also developed some sweet looking dog CQC techniques for when it tries to jump up on me with it's nasty dog claws.

I'm thinking I'm going to have to start busting out some dempsey rolls or some shit for it to get the picture though. Thing seriously doesn't give a fuck at all.

OG

i think muros dog is a reflection of muro.

hes u in dog form O=

not listening, doin whatever, wreckin shyte.

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Servo

Put the mut in a Peruvian Necktie.

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Miburo

@OG-Hey fuck you. =D

That dog is dumb as shit. I wouldn't walk into Brock Lesnar's house, eat all his shit, and then take a dump on his floor. Especially after he just bought me some outback or some shit. Because Brock Lesnar could fuck me up, and it's just a straight up dick move. I at least have some sort of code as to who I'm a dick to.

And it's not my dog. It's my bitch sister's dog. It's definitely more like her.

My dog is cool as shit and mounts other dogs to show his dominance and isn't afraid of anything. That's more like me.

Darth-Nero

Is that the same dog that ate your peanut butter straight from the jar?

I remember you mentioned that in a middle of one of your stories,was so lulzy.

Miburo

I don't remember. But if I said it, then it happened.

Vanity

What type of dog is the stupid thing, again?

__________________
My nerves are bad to-night.
Yes, bad.

Stay with me.

Speak to me.
Why do you never speak?

Speak.
What are you thinking of?

What thinking?
What?

I never know what you are thinking.

Think.

Miburo

German Shorthaired Pointer



Pretty cute, huh? You want it? I'll mail it to you for free.

zer0systm

I'll take it as long as you supply the gun and full magazine with it =D <3

Dogs are like children with the only difference being it's harder cover up your kids death than your dogs......

__________________
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Miburo

I want to kill it so bad, but I can't. Just look at it. And I've known it since it was a wee little pup. Dammit, I am weak. = (

I also can't fathom how it's puny dog mind works. Does it even realize what it is doing pisses me off while it's doing it? I serious think it's just so goddamn stupid that it just like "Oh, hamburgers, nomnomnomnomnom." You know, like, it's acting purely on impulse. All Id.

I just can't see it thinking "Oh hay, I think I'll try to piss off this guy that feeds me, and that can fucking kill me with his bare hands no sweat, for no reason at all."

So that's pretty much the only reason I haven't tied it to a tree and repeatedly hit it with a sledgehammer. I think it's just so incredibly stupid that it doesn't even realize what it's doing. And that it's not really intentionally trying to be an asshole. It's just an asshole. But not for the sake of being one. If that makes any sense.

Darth-Nero

That's one stupid dog,I can tell from it's eyes.

so yeah probably it doesn't know it's doing something bad.

Miburo

Oh, it knows I'm going to be pissed after it does something, because it runs and hides somewhere. I think that's more of a "Oh shit, what have I done?!" Kinda response though. I think before it does it and while it's doing it that it doesn't comprehend the longer term ramifications of it's actions.


But yeah, it does have soulless freaky as fuck eyes just like that.