Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes!

goku100 · 02-21-2009, 06:29 AM

Quote:

Well, stories don't get much worse than this. A 14-year-old boy in China was killed when his chair exploded, sending chunks of metal into his rectum. The bleeding this caused killed him.

The alleged explosion came from the gas cylinder that was in the base of the chair, the part that allowed the user to adjust the seat up and down. The canister gets compressed when you sit on it, but can it actually create enough energy to make the seat cushion explode like that and kill a man? I doubt it, but this is what people are reporting.

In other news, I am working from a beanbag from now on. Sweet merciful crap.

Article here

So how do you people that are sitting on them chairs feeling right now, hawhaw!

Spiegel · 02-21-2009, 03:49 PM

I don't know how to respond to that. I sit on those types of chairs a lot so now I will be think about it when I sit down and hope that my ass doesn't explode.

Tzu Men · 02-21-2009, 03:58 PM

Well... After reading that I've shifted on the seat to the edge of it. And I haven't moved...

I think if I adjust it from now one I'll get off it first. Whoopie cushions will also be prohibited as a precaution.

Seriously that's a messed up way to die, what the hell will they put in the obituary without making it sound comical?

Babyface BK · 02-21-2009, 04:08 PM

That is fucking jokes and that title aswell. I still don't believe that seat just suddenly exploded, it must've been a prank that went wrong. Also he fucking died, bleeding from the ass lol. How the fuck do you stop your ass bleeding if you cut it haha.

Freshgrease · 02-21-2009, 04:27 PM

I would be pissed too if I was a chair and someone made a habit of farting in my face.

Jaxon · 02-21-2009, 04:42 PM

K, now I feel distincly uncomfortable sitting here on my ANAL DEATH THRONE.

shadow_moon · 02-21-2009, 05:59 PM

its the worst thing to die... dying in your bleeding butt.

Sprout fancier · 02-21-2009, 07:05 PM

I see IKEA failed to keep this under wraps!

Freshgrease · 02-21-2009, 08:55 PM

IKEA is in Sweden (the most manly of all countries BTW). Chinese probably tried to undercut an already cheap product by making it CHINESE-class cheap.

EDIT: What I meant was, Chinese aren't going to buy Swedish stuff when they could just use their own stuff.

02-21-2009, 09:09 PM

I lol'd pretty hard.

**Ninja48** · 02-21-2009, 10:06 PM

Here's what happened:

1) goku100 posts a funny news story
2) FG actually makes a decent post
3) Jaxon inserts awesomely funny post

Good thread I say.

Sevi · 02-21-2009, 11:02 PM

I'm sitting on that exact same chair.
Hell, it's even the same color.
....
Fuck this, I'm getting a comfortable, non-exploding plus anal-death chair.

Freshgrease · 02-22-2009, 01:24 AM

Time to go buy that $500 kevlar seat cushion.

swimming95 · 02-22-2009, 07:47 AM

wow, that is actually really weird and strangely hilarious. I know I speak for many when I say, I am never sitting in one of those chairs the same way again

Hurricane Chronicles · 02-22-2009, 07:11 PM

Wouldnt it be bitch if you went to hell after that lol that would just top it off

02-21-2009, 03:49 PM	#2
Spiegel Pirate King Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Grand Line (New World) Age: 25 Posts: 4,928 Thanks: 1,086 Thanked 1,619 Times in 853 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! I don't know how to respond to that. I sit on those types of chairs a lot so now I will be think about it when I sit down and hope that my ass doesn't explode. __________________ "Inherited will, the destiny of the age, and the dreams of its people. These are things that will not be stopped. As long as people continue to pursue the meaning of freedom, these things will never cease to be!" -Gol D. Roger Ex-Kakashi87

02-21-2009, 03:58 PM	#3
Tzu Men hostis humani generis Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 715 Thanks: 4,026 Thanked 2,707 Times in 864 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! Well... After reading that I've shifted on the seat to the edge of it. And I haven't moved... I think if I adjust it from now one I'll get off it first. Whoopie cushions will also be prohibited as a precaution. Seriously that's a messed up way to die, what the hell will they put in the obituary without making it sound comical?

02-21-2009, 04:08 PM	#4
Babyface BK <3===BK Join Date: Mar 1988 Location: With My Babeh Age: 25 Posts: 2,245 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1,856 Times in 844 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! That is fucking jokes and that title aswell. I still don't believe that seat just suddenly exploded, it must've been a prank that went wrong. Also he fucking died, bleeding from the ass lol. How the fuck do you stop your ass bleeding if you cut it haha. __________________ "The road to success is always under construction. "

02-21-2009, 04:27 PM	#5
Freshgrease ▂▅▇█▓▒░◕‿‿◕░▒▓█▇▅▂ Join Date: Feb 2005 Age: 25 Posts: 4,112 Thanks: 1,489 Thanked 1,005 Times in 546 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! I would be pissed too if I was a chair and someone made a habit of farting in my face. __________________

02-21-2009, 04:42 PM	#6
Jaxon Groovy. Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 4,397 Thanks: 3,608 Thanked 12,543 Times in 3,693 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! K, now I feel distincly uncomfortable sitting here on my ANAL DEATH THRONE.

02-21-2009, 05:59 PM	#7
shadow_moon ANBU Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: somewhere in earth Posts: 1,686 Thanks: 0 Thanked 128 Times in 99 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! its the worst thing to die... dying in your bleeding butt. __________________ Be awed by my prowess! - Keigo Atobe

02-21-2009, 07:05 PM	#8
Sprout fancier Academy Student Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 2 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! I see IKEA failed to keep this under wraps!

02-21-2009, 08:55 PM	#9
Freshgrease ▂▅▇█▓▒░◕‿‿◕░▒▓█▇▅▂ Join Date: Feb 2005 Age: 25 Posts: 4,112 Thanks: 1,489 Thanked 1,005 Times in 546 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! IKEA is in Sweden (the most manly of all countries BTW). Chinese probably tried to undercut an already cheap product by making it CHINESE-class cheap. EDIT: What I meant was, Chinese aren't going to buy Swedish stuff when they could just use their own stuff. __________________

02-21-2009, 09:09 PM	#10
Miburo Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! I lol'd pretty hard.

02-21-2009, 10:06 PM	#11
Ninja48 48 Cypherin' Ninjas Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: 305 Posts: 2,466 Thanks: 182 Thanked 644 Times in 257 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! Here's what happened: 1) goku100 posts a funny news story 2) FG actually makes a decent post 3) Jaxon inserts awesomely funny post Good thread I say. __________________

02-21-2009, 11:02 PM	#12
Sevi Toothpick Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Here and there. Age: 19 Posts: 553 Thanks: 407 Thanked 60 Times in 26 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! I'm sitting on that exact same chair. Hell, it's even the same color. .... Fuck this, I'm getting a comfortable, non-exploding plus anal-death chair.

02-22-2009, 01:24 AM	#13
Freshgrease ▂▅▇█▓▒░◕‿‿◕░▒▓█▇▅▂ Join Date: Feb 2005 Age: 25 Posts: 4,112 Thanks: 1,489 Thanked 1,005 Times in 546 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! Time to go buy that $500 kevlar seat cushion. __________________

02-22-2009, 07:47 AM	#14
swimming95 Genin Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 181 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! wow, that is actually really weird and strangely hilarious. I know I speak for many when I say, I am never sitting in one of those chairs the same way again __________________

02-22-2009, 07:11 PM	#15
Hurricane Chronicles Hunter-Nin Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,019 Thanks: 0 Thanked 16 Times in 16 Posts	Re: Boy Killed Anally When Office Chair Explodes! Wouldnt it be bitch if you went to hell after that lol that would just top it off __________________

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